Tuesday, 22 September 2015



I kept comparing this day to the birth of a child which is silly of course.....I needed to go through the 'pain' of having my head shaved and then enjoy this WHOLE NEW LIFE that I am about to be given!!!  A terrible analogy but it got me through the morning!!

I sat out on the lounge waiting....waiting...for one of the nurses to give me a call...and then BANG...there she was (1st contraction).  At around 10.40am, a young lovely nurse called "Mary? Mary?"  (2nd contraction) with clippers in hand!!!! 

And then (very much unlike labour, hence the crap analogy) - 5 minutes later it was all gone and I was an official romper stomper.  You may have seen the photo on my page.  For the record....I hate it.  I feel horrid and unattractive and unfeminine and bleaugh...and I don't need the compliments (but thank you!) and that's just how I feel.  I'm vain enough to admit it.   

On the upside of course - no need to go looking for a Halloween costume this year !!  Uncle Fester is in da house.

So I had a cry, tried putting on make up, cried a bit more and then got over it.  It's hair.  It'll grow back.  There are wigs.  My little sister is a hairdresser.  THIS IS TEMPORARY.  


I sucked it up; got over my pity-party for one and then chatted with my fellow baldies who were (of course) complimentary as everyone is.  I need to see it as a Badge of Honour or a Rite of Passage.  This girls certainly don't care what I look like (nor I them) and after some easy chatter, all was well with the world again. 


At around 12.30 - 1pm, Nicolai came looking for me, ready to start the Transplant!  I was set up in my room and Nicolai, Anastasia, Dr Fedorenko and Valva were with me.  An infusion was first put through and then about 1/2 way through that, they implanted the stem cells back into my body! 

It was intense.  Not painful but ...yeah, intense.  I had a tomato taste in my mouth, heaviness on my chest, the oxygen was splattering water all over me, and I was shaking like jelly all over.  Really quite indescribable.  But no pain for anyone researching....all I can keep thinking it...that was intense!! 

After that (stem cells all safely back in), the infusion was finished and I was left to rest for a bit, my body still shaking - like popping candy shaking.....and then...JOB DONE.

Officially, Dr F and the team (including me) have removed MS from my body (thanks to the b**** that is Chemo) and we have transplanted healthy stem cells back into my body to help rebuild a clean immune system!!   My head just can't get around it!!  How AMAZING is that!!

Of course, for me this does not necessarily mean I will see improvements - as the procedure doesn't claim to fix established lesions it just STOPS further progression....BUT I've seen a lot of improvement in others with my type of MS.  I think it's safe to say that I'm a determined little so-and-so, and as such I will do the work required to gain whatever I can!  Both Dr F and I are pretty confident here :).  I think he gets me!

I'm sure many readers are not religious or spiritual but I can honestly say I felt very connected and safe in knowledge that God has had me all through this.  I've never felt alone and I really feel that I've been carried through the tough times (and all of you slugging back wines for me has definitely helped too, I have no doubt)!  It's been a blessing:  this 'journey'...the community support with fundraising and following my page; the new friendships; the people I've met here at this time, the Doctor and team, the challenges that I faced up to...yeah...the timing was right I guess....I feel God is right in the trenches with me.  I feel safe.

Anyway - it just feels surreal.  I can't get my head around it - probably because I'm still hobbling etc but I am SOOOOO HAPPY right now!!!!  I WAS SOMEONE WHO USED TO HAVE MS.

PS ....CRAP!  I just went to the ladies and scared the crap out of myself in the mirror with this head.  This is gunna take some getting used to! 


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